The Power Of Fish

You are probably asking yourself, who gives a rats ass about fish? Two words... I DO! I know, you're thinking to yourself that I, the obsessively indoor kind of girl, has gone completely out of her mind. (this does have some truth to it, actually!) However, my fish story has it's origins which began 5 days ago. I'll start at the beginning....Monday began as any other Monday should, for the "deployed spouse left behind", mother. Reality sinks in, as you frantically try and keep things in order. Kids to school, finals to study and prepare for, work, etc....But then it occured to me, as I had already freely sailed effortlessly through the first 1/2 of my day. Cheerleader practice.... on the other side of town, 4 times a week and the younger ADHD/Autisic child who was going to be seriously pissed having to be drug along.....Now this is no ordinary child, mind you. This is the 9 year old son, who refuses to leave the sanctuary of his room for even candy! Much less, to be drug all over town to further support his older sisters cheerleading career. But off we go..... no dinner, no medication, no gameboy. You can surely picture how THIS story unfolds! (yes, he is still breathing...)Thus begins Tuesday, the next day...... and then Wednesday. I am at my wits end! I can NOT do this for 6 months! This is insanity! Total, round off, back handpring, back handspring, back tuck INSANITY!Enter the fish:I suddenly realize, that nobody was "forcing" me to sit there night after night, fighting off the urges to strangle my kid! Or at the very least, put him on a plane to stay with his deployed dad over seas. We can go, TO THE PET STORE!And so begins Thursday..... The excitment building beyond belief! I had a miraculous, supernatural intervention in my wilted brain! I was back in pure creative form, which had been previously left at the airport that horrible Saturday morning..... The PET STORE! With FISH! I love fish! Fish must be the greatest invention ever! Red Platy's, Goldfish, Sail Fin Mollies................ This is going to be great!!!! HooRah!!The anticipation is unbearable......The time is here. It's 6:55. I slowly and apprehensively turn to my little professional cheerleader, and utter the words...."Today, I'm just gonna drop you off, ok?" She looks at me in disbelief.... shock. I'm her biggest fan. And I'm gonna do what?? I assure her, it will be fine!!I can't get out of the parking lot fast enough!!!! The steady click of my blinker seems to drag endlessly on and on. I begin to count the stupid ticks of the blinker. 46, 47, 48...... Where the hell did this traffic come from?!And then, there it is....... we enter the glorious kingdom. My slavation for the ADHD child. We see it all.... the fish, the guinea pigs, the ferrets, the mice, the cats, and the birds..... Oh, it's all so beautiful! All the diffrernt colors of the fish. We counted every single one!! PetSmart has exactly 357,931 fish, 37 mice, 8 rats, 3 cats, 5 ferrets and 31 birds! Why hadn't I thought of this sooner? God, I amaze even myself at times! Even the zoo doesn't compare to this!!!Sadly, I came to understand, that there is only so much to do within the wonderful walls of PetSmart... We did it all. We saw it all. And we had a blast doing it! As we head back to cheerleader practice, I glance at the clock. WHAT?!? 20 minutes?! This can't be right!! We saw 400,000 kinds of fish in 20 MINUTES?? Someone, wake me up from this nightmare.......So life goes on... another day, another brilliant, divine plane, thrown to the wayside......Back to Plan A.... A one way ticket to Guam for my son.Who likes freaking fish, anyway?